Tremendous images of nudity

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We’ve reached the magic 64-post mark, and it’s finally time for the obligatory “search terms that brought people here” post. Here’s a sampling of those that don’t involve confusion over the end of Skyline, confusion over whether Kim Basinger or Brad Pitt or “Sex on Wheels” was in Who Framed Roger Rabbit [no, that was Cool World], animated gifs of Mick McCarthy, the Paisley Panda, Sten Egil Dahl, Björn Vleminckx, the weasels from Roger Rabbit, x-rated animated gifs of Betty Boop, or requests for Jennifer Salt, Margot Kidder, Glynis Johns, Marjorie Woodworth, Joan Blondell, Dame Maggie Smith, or Jessica Rabbit naked.

* * *

Image searches

  • hot women deer hunters devotional posters
  • man with rainbow shooting out of chest
  • cup of pee spilling picture
  • snappy dressing chess players
  • thug with binoculars
  • disco female mullets
  • female eighties mullet
  • big fat jason scotland
  • two people being funny
  • small ugly people
  • normal looking people
  • ocean nudity
  • blood nudity
  • tremendous images of nudity

Celebrity image searches

  • robert wagner chest
  • robert wagner shirt off
  • robert wagner trunks
  • robert wagner feet
  • young robert wagner feet
  • robert wagner trombone
  • jeggings ted nugent
  • charlie day naked
  • charles durning nude
  • the marx brothers hotdogs images
  • tommy lee jones bitch please
  • cate blanchett muddy
  • natalie portmans ears
  • natalie portman ears
  • myrna loy’s ears
  • myrna loy hair
  • myrna loy hat
  • glynis johns feet
  • terry moore feet (x 3)
  • terry moore high arches
  • hot keri russell honey i blew up the kid

Clowns

  • homer simpson and crustly the clown
  • clown crasty
  • drunk clown
  • cokie the clown
  • mundane the clown
  • ultra realism clown
  • clown camp for kids
  • interlocking clown blocks

Nintendo

  • bowser wedding
  • wedding bowser
  • peach getting married with bowser
  • bowser stealing peach
  • peach and bowser funny love comics
  • peach and bowser
  • peach et bowser
  • peach y bowser love
  • bowser and peach in love
  • red peach van bowser
  • bowser love song
  • bowser and peach doing it
  • rule 34 peach and bowser

Ringer

  • darryl stephens current hair style
  • darryl stephens hair
  • sarah michelle gellar low bun
  • sarah michelle gellar hair half up
  • ringer bad acting
  • acting on ringer so bad
  • kristoffer polaha terrible actor

Beautiful Persian actresses

  • golshifteh farahani husband (x 4)
  • golshifteh farahani hot (x 3)
  • golshifteh farahani with husband
  • golshifteh farahani and her husband
  • golshifteh farahani’s husband
  • golshifteh farahani wikipedia
  • golshifteh farahani sexe legs photo
  • golshifteh farahani in bedroom
  • golshifteh farahani sex scene
  • golshifteh farahani sex
  • golshifteh farahani nude
  • golshifteh farahani nude picture
  • hd golshifteh farahani wallpaper

Miscellaneous

  • elevator sexy science
  • alabama calculator gag pictures
  • man with binocular cake
  • “he’s a loser” bicycle cincinnati
  • refining clay from soil in buckets
  • cartoon monsters living in one place
  • white women who love mystikal
  • martin tyler commentary in fifa 2011 he says willie
  • which colors suggest sensualism and lure guys
  • filipino seaman in womens club
  • ominous microcephalus
  • interesting cafeteria
  • down from the hills came mountain pete

Abstract

  • need room would keep always on video with my one love in the eye have 20 negrons worms in new york
  • food born in 1934 and am still thriving today. as a matter of fact you can find me here in south tampa. although i’m very “normal” , back in 1934 my main product was viewed with some skepticism. what am i?
  • i’d search to the far corners of the ether to find those teutonic lesbian vamps.
  • in the 1930’s people putting something in a bag what?
  • butter lady riding kyurem the pokemon
  • french betrayal movies mother with a husband with the small
  • red skelton :when roses are red, they’re ready to pluck, when girls are sixteen, they’re ready to
  • why is the nickname for anthony t.j?
  • looney tunes characters less known hitting with a wrist
  • we don’t afraid of the virginian wolf
  • faye dunaway sells building in shropshire
  • masoneria ssssssss
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Most favored of the disfavored

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"You're like a flower that grew out of a pot of dirt."

For every terrible band you hate, I bet you at least have a favorite song. For some bands [Journey, Staind] this may still be a song you hate. For the following bands, these are songs I actually like.

  • KISS
    “Heaven’s on Fire”
  • Limp Bizkit
    “Rearranged”
  • Bon Jovi
    “Bad Medicine”
  • Poison
    “Fallen Angel”
  • Creed
    “My Sacrifice”
  • Nickelback
    “Never Again”
  • Matchbox 20
    “Real World”
  • Aerosmith
    “Livin’ on the Edge” / “Rag Doll”
  • Boy bands in general
    “Larger Than Life” / “When the Lights Go Out”
  • REO Speedwagon
    “Time For Me To Fly”
  • Steve Miller Band
    “Fly Like an Eagle”
  • The Doors
    “Riders on the Storm”

How to decorate your Mergenthaler linotype machine

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Zachary Scott (left) needs Dane Clark to be the man that he himself cannot be in this scene from WHIPLASH (Lewis Seiler, 1948), the best classic film I watched this summer. Click for a good piece about it.

Do other blogs not go on summer vacation? I forgot to inquire.

My vision for this blog, my grand encompassing vision, was a magazinish structure. Three big pieces a month and three sort of sidebars. It may be impressive that I kept that pace up for almost eight months, since it sort of depended on having co-bloggers, which have not as yet materialized.

With any sort of project, I generally fall into the trap of “making the perfect the enemy of the good”. If we can’t read the whole scientific article, we shouldn’t bother doing it superficially. If we can’t enter our vital statistics into a spreadsheet three times a week, we shouldn’t bother trying to have a half-assed diary. Get obsessed by something, then get disappointed in our inability to devote our life to it. The infrequent posting structure (three big pieces a month) was intended to minimize this problem in two ways. First, I could build up a backlog of things during periods of intense interest in the topic, and then parcel them out during periods of laziness or lack of free time. Second, I wouldn’t be spending every movie taking notes and watching out for things to write about, if I only needed to write about three things a month.

However, the infrequent posts meant that I wanted each one to be really good in some way. Therefore each should say something new, or at least juxtapose topics in a new way. Therefore I’m back to taking notes during everything I watch, because each film might only take up 1/3 of an essay. Or even worse, I decide I need to write about the movie version of a book that I want to recommend (1, 2), and that requires re-reading the book. Or I start various series of posts and then realize that there’s not much room left in the posting schedule for posts that aren’t part of a series.

To put it briefly, if you envision your blog as a micro-Onion AV Club, you need more than one contributor. In the words of Ringo Starr, “I’m warning you, with peace and love, I have too much to do.”

So at the beginning of the summer (summer defined as the period between my work-related week in Davidson, N.C. and my family-related week in Raleigh, N.C.) I put the whole thing on hiatus instead of letting it peter out. And now, it’s back.

 

Wedding reception playlist

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– June 5, 2010.

– Songs are not listed in correct order.

  • B-52s, “Rock Lobster”
  • Billy Idol, “Dancing With Myself”
  • Daft Punk, “Digital Love”
  • Depeche Mode, “Policy of Truth”
  • Electric Six, “Danger! High Voltage”
  • Elvis Presley, “All Shook Up”
  • Erasure, “Chains of Love”
  • Flo Rida, “Low”
  • Frank Sinatra, “New York, New York”
  • Franz Ferdinand, “Do You Want To”
  • Journey, “Open Arms”
  • Lady Gaga, “Just Dance”
  • Le Tigre, “I’m So Excited”
  • MGMT, “Electric Feel”
  • Nu Shooz, “I Can’t Wait”
  • Otis Redding, “Try a Little Tenderness”
  • O-Zone, “Dragostea Din Tei”
  • Queen, “Don’t Stop Me Now”
  • Ramones, “Blitzkrieg Bop”
  • Rick Astley, “Never Gonna Give You Up”
  • Rolling Stones, “Everybody Needs Somebody”
  • Rolling Stones, “Jumpin’Jack Flash”
  • Rolling Stones, “Start Me  Up”
  • Van Morrison, “Into the Mystic”
  • Van Morrison, “Brown-Eyed Girl”
  • Village People, “YMCA”
  • Young Rascals, “Good Lovin'”
  • The Time Warp

"Webster's Dictionary defines 'wedding' as 'the fusing of two metals with a hot torch'. Well, you know something. I think you guys are two metals. Gold medals."

FIFA 11 diary 3: Drinkbitter and Leadwater

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Console time has been hard to come by lately, with my good lady wife embroiled in AssCreeBro, BioShock 2, and now BioShock DLC: Minerva’s Den. And my console time has been spent mostly on a more multifarious endeavor than the SPL season: a many-pronged assault on the English FA Cup, in the form of an array of teams, good and bad, that all wear blue. Plus a lot of exhibition games practicing skills such as “placed shot” which then atrophy when they turn out to be unnecessary for winning against Semi-Pro competition. [Necessary to get near double figures, perhaps.] Here’s the journey as yet unfinished [in fact I have no idea how many rounds are left].

Take one.

  • Southend 0-0 Charlton
    We may have been outshot 11-3, but we outtackled the ex-Curbishleyites 42-12. Playing as Southend United is not what you’d call exhilarating.
  • Southend 0-1 Charlton

    Wipe that smirk off your face, Zaaboub.

    Shots were equal at 13 this time. I committed a red card in the person of someone named “Zaaboub”, who “struggled for fitness and … had his contract cancelled” after only 3 games with the Shrimpers IRL.

  • Bolton 10-1 Bristol City
    First double-digit scoreline in Semi-Pro. Elmander, Zat Knight and Davies truly are kings among men.
  • Cardiff 0-4 Swansea
    Outshot 17-10 [10-0 in shots on goal]. As it turns out, the game settings switched to Legendary difficulty and 4-minute halves again. Am I pressing some sort of button combo that makes that happen? Let’s just restart the whole thing, because the main reason I chose all these blue teams was to be Cardiff. Bolton aren’t even supposed to be blue, no matter what their away shirts look like. Let’s stop using them for symmetry’s sake.

Take two.

  • Ipswich 0-1 Leicester
    What the hell! After a couple practice exhibitions at the normal, reasonable settings, I start another FA Cup and end up with Legendary and 4 again. And I’d like to say I’m getting better at keeping the score down when there’s no hope of my team scoring, but really it’s just that Márton Fülöp is the best goalie in all of FIFA 11. He was magisterial for these 8 minutes.

Take three.

  • Southend 3-0 Burton Albion
    [Paterson/Corr 21, Mohsni/Spencer 76, Zaaboub/Corr 79]
    Third time’s the charm as we get a fine performance from not just the chastened Zaaboub, but Mohnsi as well. As of this writing, Southend United, the 77th-place team in the English pyramid, have players of six different nationalities. Albeit the Welshman and the Barbadozer were really born in England. Burton Albion, yes, Burton Albion, have a guy who keeps doing stepovers, which I may not have seen in FIFA 11 before.
  • Everton 1-1 Peterborough
    [Osman/Saha 77]
    Great googa mooga, why is it so hard to play as Everton? The answer may be Louis Saha. No matter what the situation is, if he’s the only person attacking, and he has the ball, and it’s him and the goalie, he is not going to score. Even if I try to do “placed shot”, he hits the bar. If I don’t do “placed shot”, he hits it right at the keeper. And no other Evertonian ever follows him into the box. It’s almost as if we should change the formation or something.
  • Southend 0-5 Wolves
    Well, at least we had 50% possession. Track back!
  • Ipswich 3-0 Charlton
    [Townsend/Edwards 10, Edwards/Wickham 45, Wickham/Townsend 51]
    Symmetrical scorers. I’m sick of hearing Andros Townsend’s name already. What kind of name is “Andros”? I assumed Martin Tyler was saying “Ambrose”. And it actually sounded like he was saying “Ambrosch“.
  • Cardiff 3-0 Portsmouth
    [Olofinjana/Chopra 44, Chopra/Bellamy 69, Chopra/Bellamy 70]
    You may be noticing that I don’t score unassisted goals anymore. In fact, if I’m running up to the goalie unmarked, and I don’t have anyone to pass to, I’ve started just passing anyway, and then the other team clears it. That’s how unlikely I am to score one-on-one, no matter who the attacker is. Will have to work on the green button-red button shot fake thing. Or start using the right analog stick.
  • Everton 4-2 Peterborough
    [Arteta/Saha 28, Beckford/Saha 46, Bilyaletdinov/Arteta 52, Baines/Beckford 74]
    That Baines goal was a beauty, from a corner and several passes. May not have scored from outside the penalty area in Semi-Pro before. And guess what … I changed the formation. Now Saha isn’t by himself up there, for God’s sake. 

    Leadbitter (with Sunderland) and Drinkwater (with Huddersfield)

  • Ipswich 0-0 Sheffield Wednesday
    In addition to Ambrosch Townsend, I’m now sick of hearing Marcus Tudgay’s name. And this “Leadbitter” on Ipswich is the same player as Cardiff’s “Drinkwater” with different hair. Are they the two skinniest guys in the game?
  • Everton 3-1 Manchester United
    [Saha/Cahill 58, Saha/Cahill 64, Saha/Fellaini 74]
    Two thirds of this match was spent trying to confirm Everton’s status as the team of misfortune. Then I changed to 4-2-2-2 and scored within ten seconds. And then two more. Rio Ferdinand’s red card didn’t hurt. Saha’s hat trick means Phil Jagielka was Man of the Match. Does that yellow checkered flag thing really mean MotM? Because it takes a five-goal glut for any attacker on my teams to receive that honor – otherwise it’s someone who spends his time getting the ball off the opposing striker.
  • Cardiff 5-0 Bristol Rovers
    [Chopra/Bellamy 6, Burke/Chopra 24, Chopra/Drinkwater 45, Bellamy/Chopra 51, Chopra/McNaughton 84]
    Chopra gets Man of the Match with a mere three goals and two assists. Bristol Rovers have a nifty 5’7″ guy named “Kuffour” who runs circles around his foes. I like these short and elusive Allen Iverson types. Unlike Collin Samuel, his counterpart on St Johnstone who loves to dribble it into the goalkeeper, Kuffour is programmed to cross to teammates who could easily put it in but choose to sky it into the crowd.
  • Ipswich 7-1 Sheffield Wednesday
    [Norris/Edwards 8, Norris/Townsend 29, Scotland/Townsend 45, Scotland/Townsend 46, Scotland/Townsend 48, Scotland/Townsend 59, Scotland/Priskin 83]
    Turns out every team is better in 4-2-2-2. It’s so obvious now. Man of the Match: O’Dea.

Collin Samuel, back when he was with Toronto FC

I can’t read the dates or tournament details on our TV, so we might be in the quarterfinals already or we might be only a third of the way through. Whatever ineffable improvements have been made to my talents now need to be taken back to Perth and the rest of the SPL, to meet back up with Collin Samuel as soon as possible. And when we return to the FA Cup, we must remember to always check the Game Settings to make sure they aren’t on Legendary difficulty and 4-minute halves.

Captain Potter’s log, March 11th, 2011.

Recent accomplishments:

  • Learned not to use the blue button for heading when facing my own goal. The blue button seems to lead to the most powerful and directed headers.
  • The yellow button turns out to have a use after all. It’s for passing to where someone is going to be, rather than to where he is like the green button. You have to use it judiciously, but it’s good for getting the ball to a winger in his stride, so he can outpace the defense.
  • Have accepted that there is no way to control the keeper, until he has the ball. But it’s possible to get out of his way.
  • Can choose to play defensively. And rediscovering the yellow button for passing makes counterattack more feasible.
  • Can pass interminably back and forth to protect a lead.
  • Have successfully used the red button-green button fake shot. Once.
  • Have figured out how to shoot penalties.

Things to work on:

Jo Kuffour reptates through the Chairboys

  • How to switch back fakingly when running toward the goalie, without then running into a crowd of defenders.
  • Corner kicks. Does it matter which direction I’m facing, or which direction I point the stick when I kick it, or both, or neither? My corner kick technique seems to be regressing.
  • Chip shots, and “placed shots”. Presumably will be needed at higher skill levels.
  • Am now unable to succeed with formations other than 4-2-2-2. Am unclear why I would need to do so.
  • Have forgotten how to control the keeper on penalties.
  • That world-class striker Matt Jarvis racks up a hat trick whenever he plays my team. Maybe we should just let him enjoy it.

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